Anthony Weiner Looks Particularly “Weiner-Like” In News Photo: Masses Chuckle

...look at that veiny neck-shaft.

…look at that veiny neck-shaft.

Snowden now blames leak on a “REPLY-ALL” mistake

snowden_oops“Some girls at work thought I was really edgy for trying to take down the man.  So while initially I had planned on saying it was a mistake, I started saying I did it on purpose and that my main motive was freedom.  They loved the part about freedom,” said Edward Snowden from the transit area of Sheremetyevo Airport in Moscow on leaking NSA information.

Snowden mentioned there were several times he could have contained the situation but chose to act against his best instincts.

“Well, I started to enjoy a certain level of celebrity that I was comfortable with,” said Snowden.

He went on to talk about how the charges of espionage provided a level of excitement for life he thought unattainable.  “When your life starts to become like a spy movie, you know you’re doing it right,” said Snowden.

“But then everything got out of hand fast like a snowball effect or what I like to call now the ‘Snowden’ effect,” continued Snowden, with a wink.

“Now, I’m in Moscow and basically reaching out to any country that will grant me asylum,” he remarked.

He plans to be very careful in the future with emails though he already admitted to accidentally sending his first asylum request to Ecuador to the wrong email account.

“The email didn’t bounce, so I thought it made it to the right officials.  But that mistake is the main reason I’ve been tied up in Moscow so long,” said Snowden.

2013: Top 5 Summer Vacation Spots (to Hide from the NSA)

NSaaaaayyyyy!Well, summertime is finally here! It’s a time to kick back, relax, and hope the government isn’t looking through your porn collection on your computer. Texting your boyfriend to discuss going to the beach? “Count us in!” says the NSA. SnapChatting some cute bikini pics to your friends? Well, Reggie in the surveillance department thanks you.

Privacy is sooooo o-u-t, OUT! But there’s still plenty of time to enjoy your summer vacation like they do on TV! Ever watched Big Brother on CBS? Well now, Big Brother is watching you!

Check out our choices for hot vacation spots this year!


MoscowNSA

Moscow, Russia

Did we say hot? We meant cold. Like pretty damn cold, we hear. But all you need is a bottle of vodka and your political assylum to keep you warm at night! Plus maybe you’ll get lucky and find someone special at one of the… spire-topped… buildings. “In Soviet Russia, summer break you!”

Penguinsnsa

Antarctica

We were going to put Cancun in our number two slot, but with such close proximity to the U.S.? More like CAN’Tcun! So this year we’re recommending beautiful Antarctica! With average July temperatures of -75° Fyou and the whole family will be itching to take off your wool sweaters and show off those sleek and sexy under-sweaters. Kick back and relax in an igloo and play with the polar bears! Or the penguins… which ones live in Antarctica again?

chinansa
Hong Kong, China

Ludacris said it best when he recommended getting his “eyes chinky here with Chingy at the Holidae Inn,” but when it comes to hotels that are free from US government agents busting down your door – more like Holidae OUT! You’ll want to stay in one of the luxurious hotels of Hong Kong, China. Enjoy the sights of an entirely new culture and landscape from the view of the crack in the cardboard you put over your window! Leak as many documents as you can muster right from the comfort of your twin size cot. You can even order room service! Just make sure that sweet and sour pork isn’t sweet and sour POISONED! ;)

basementnsa
Your Basement

For many of us this summer, we’re just fed up with having our privacy breached and freedoms impeded. Fear not! If you’re looking for a getaway on a budget, consider a “staycation.” Rip that phone out of the wall! Your Internet and computer, too! And your television! That could have a tiny little camera in it, right? Toss them all in the back yard and enjoy a nice bonfire. But don’t unplug and burn your blender – you’ll need it for margaritas while you board up your doors and windows!

marsnsa
Mars

How about a vacation that’s out of this world? Look no further than scenic Mars! The one (and only) destination guaranteed to offer the privacy and respect that only a dead red planet can. Bring your oxygen tanks, because Mars looks like the only place that offers some room to breathe.